The Dogs of Bollywood

***SPOILERS***

Yes, you read the title right, this is an ode to the canine's of our silver screen. The loyal dost to those heroes we pine over. The cuddly, fluffy, know-it-all heroes we never knew we needed. This list involves basically as many dogs as I could find and if there's any interesting facts about them, but honestly, don't think the dog can say 'I hated working with Akshay', so it's all fairly speculative.

1) 'Tuffy' in Hum Aapke Hain Koun

Tuffy, the dog who pretty much saved a relationship, a family's ties and won over our hearts in the process. This audacious role was played by Redo, who was owned by the Assistant Director Madhkar Sawle. After the filming, Madhuri fell in love with and then adopted Redo. He later died in 2000 at age 12. We love you Tuffy.

2) 'Moti' in Teri Meherbaniyan

Brownie plays the role of 'Moti' (a sentence my mother would say every time I picked up a cake), who takes the main stage in this film. Moti witnesses the murder of its owner and goes on a revenge rampage, killing those who have hurt its family. I can't really find out much about Brownie, but I can imagine it's living a peaceful and beautiful life in heaven, where no one gets hurt and never cries on screen, because Brownie found out how much it hurts me when I see a dog CRYING ON SCREEN.

3) 'Moti' in Sachaa Jhutha

Moti can be considered famous (as mother would say to me when I would attempt to get permission to meet friends in Pizza Hut), as the dog Rexy starred in two films. This one and and action/drama Dhamkee. Moti was the only creature in this film who could recognise its owner after lots of swaps and replacements were made. There's absolutely zero information on Rexy despite this, but again, I imagine Rexy's chilling in heaven with a bunch of babes.

4) 'Pluto Mehra' in Dil Dhadakne Do

Pluto is voiced by Aamir Khan, who narrates the film of a dysfunctional family who celebrate the parents 30th wedding anniversary on a cruise. (This film is pretty cute and I enjoyed it FYI.) You know, I can't find who the real dog is, what its name is or where he came from other than 'he has returned to London' has been mentioned in a few articles. Unsurprisingly breed sales in bullmastiffs have increased since the release of the film, I just hope breeders are being sensible.

5) 'Entertainment' in Entertainment

Akshay with Junior who plays the lovable Entertainment, in film, Entertainment. It's a shame the film doesn't live up to the name. As all humans, Akshay is jealous of Entertainment's pure and loyal way of being the heir to his father's fortunes, so tries to kill him (like, not shooty stabby kill him, because a film like that should be thrown into the sun). Entertainment continues being pure and loving, which makes Akshay eventually fall for him and then in the end they live happily ever after (after Entertainment takes a bullet and nearly dies, in turn, nearly killing my heart).

6) 'Jambo' in Khoon Bhari Maang 

Jambo takes a bullet for the icon Rekha, and dies. The heart-breakingly loyal dog in this film doesn't seem to have a real name (according to iMDb and Wikipedia), so in my eyes, he died when he was killed in the film, which means I can no longer talk about this.

7) 'Dobby' in Maa

Dobby (lol, JK Rowling?) is played by Brownie The Dog (there's a theme in names, you may have noticed) who can see the ghost of his dead owner and takes care of her child by taking orders. This is kind of a rip off of film Ghost, but if Ghost had a dog, which would have made it so much better. Bollywood knows best.

8) 'Rocky' in Holiday: A Soldier Is Never Off Duty 

I watched this film yesterday, because Netflix really needs to up its game in Bollywood films and I was saddled with this dogshit (*looks up, waiting for applause*). Akshay is back, with a dog, who doesn't play a big part in the film, but features as his pet. There's a (very obviously green screened) scene where Akshay gives Rocky his sister's dupatta, and the dog helps him take down a terrorist cell. Again, Rocky's real name is not revealed, but let's call him Moti (or what my mother would say every time I walked into a room).

9) 'Dog' in Main Prem Ki Deewani Hoon

Firstly, don't watch this film, unless you want to see a CGI pet parrot act a fool. I found 'What is the dog breed in main prem ki deewani hoon?' in Yahoo! Answers and the only answer is 'never watch main prem ki deewani hoon', which pretty much sums it up. Let's not blame the shortcomings of humans on dogs, though. This dog is adorable as hell.

10) 'Loose Motion' in Chillar Party

I've never seen this, because there's loads of promo shots of Salamander Khan posing with these kids topless and it's made me very uncomfortable. His dead yet evil eyes cannot be ignored. (Salamander produced this film, it's not that random). Anyway, this dog is named 'loose motion' because it's a...um...messy bitch. Pretty gross right? Nonetheless, the film is about dog catchers and children's (sometimes) unwavering love for canines.